I would like to hear from other community supporters what they think is the most effective way to get students to go out and actually dance socially?
I know for me, Karen and I started our tango adventure from Drop In lessons at a Practica. So there was no change for us. So i have no personal experience to draw on for this issue.
But it seems that very few of the new students in our community are making the change from the protection/structure of the classroom environment to the social exposure of Pratica/Milonga Tango world.
Can teachers and/or organizers do anything to help move students in this direction? Are there any tips or tricks of the trade? Any insight to this issue would help :)
Thanks!
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
Sunday, November 9, 2008
Tango Boredom and Burnout
It has been said that it is human nature to experience various levels of burnout and/or boredom after a number of years doing any activity. I believe the same can be true for dancing Argentine tango. Some of you might say that burnout from the very activity that has brought so much passion, emotion, and growth to so many of us, is downright impossible. On the contrary, it is often those things (or people) that we love the most – and thus throw ourselves at with often years-long abandon – that may become frustrating, stale, and in dire need of reevaluating.
Over the fifteen years that I have been dancing exclusively Argentine tango, these feelings of burnout and boredom have come up many times. Perhaps it is a feeling of not learning ‘fast enough’; or feeling that I am not pleasing my partners as much as I have been in the past; or perhaps that I simply am not sleeping enough! Worse still, on more than one occasion, I have felt that my local community was imploding, collapsing under the weight of it’s own bloat. Examples of this in my area include fifty-plus local teachers, several milongas on weekend nights all battling for limited numbers of dancers, or self-described ‘advanced’ dancers who refuse to improve their navigation skills. Whatever the reasons, one’s local tango scene can sometimes become a burden rather than a place of pleasure and revitalization. I imagine that one could find many more examples of community-induced madness.
When the feelings of tango burnout arise in me, I do one or all of these three things:
First, I just back off from tango. In spite of my bloated-ego wish to believe that I am the center of the tango universe, my local scene, and everything else in this world, will go on without me! I take a few days or even weeks off to do something else. I work on the house, do my taxes, mow the lawn and trim the roses. I take yoga and Spanish classes or (heaven forbid!) a Swing dance class. I do anything but tango, including not listening to tango music for a while. Balance in life, as in a good retirement portfolio, is key. Diversify and we will grow old gracefully and with our assets in tact. And our roses will be trimmed and our Spanish or French or Japanese more fluent. Tango will wait, and for me is always a bit ‘shinier’ when I return.
Second, if I am unable or unwilling to remove myself from the tango scene, I try something that is anathema to the normal tango learning process; rather than trying to learn something new, I go back to my roots, so to speak. For example, I have taken lately to walking only in parallel system for an entire night, or even for an entire month. This idea came to me while dancing when I looked around the milonga and saw virtually every leader dancing erratically in cross system. I was horrified to realize that I was doing exactly the same thing, following the ‘heard mentality’ that comes with social dancing and so many other human activities. It was apparent to me that trying harder to be ‘better’ and more interesting for my partners was simply not working for me or for her. In contrast, I now try to walk simpler, gentler, and more musical, but only in parallel system. The result is that I find myself in a more Zen-like state, unable to rush to my ‘comfort zone’ of dancing (which is cross system for me, the place where I sometimes lose my sense of balance and calm).
For followers, who cannot determine the system that you are walking in, I recommend trying something different from your ordinary patterns. For example try closing your eyes, and/or not doing any embellishments; or perhaps try focusing wholly and completely on the music and not so much on your partner. See if you can feel and breathe your way to calming yourself and your partner down - be a force of grounding and relaxation to him/her. They may wonder what the heck you are doing at first, but then he may just calm down himself as a result (or get stressed that things don’t feel ‘normal’ and start jumping around like a wild banshee). In either case, you can start to shift the static paradigm that you are in. So often followers are also trying to ‘be better’, or trying to achieve that ‘perfect tango image’ that is painted by professional stage dancers, but end up simply more tense and stressed as a result. Instead, just be your self. It cannot hurt to try, especially if you are frustrated with or tired of your tango. You may find new pearls of wisdom and understanding about the lead/follow relationship in that place of calm.
My last trick for keeping my dancing life fresh and renewed, is to occasionally dance less and spend more time socializing with friends and collogues at the milongas. First, I make sure that they are open to talking with me as I do not want to be in the way of their dancing with someone else or enjoying their night out. Perhaps the song playing is their very favorite, and I can reasonably assume that they may be looking for a partner to dance with. If not, I find it refreshing to spend quality time during a song, a tanda, perhaps even two tandas, just talking, telling jokes, catching up on old times or things to come. This is especially nice as there are so many dancers, both men and women, who for myriad reasons I do not get to dance with or don’t see very often. Making a personal connection can be very satisfying in those moments. The dance can wait; to be in a hurry to get back to it may just be exacerbating the tension and ambivalence that I might be feeling toward it.
Without question, for so many of us dancing tango is the absolute focus of our passion and drive to spend our money and travel sometimes hundreds or even thousands of miles to milongas and tango festivals. But, like so many things in life, dancing is a shared experience, one accomplished only with friends and acquaintances. Ultimately it is our friends who sustain us, not just our teachers and/or tango idols. We have the rest of our lives to pursue our passion, and we must make sure to nurture our selves and our friendships along the way.
Christopher Nassopoulos
October 2008
Over the fifteen years that I have been dancing exclusively Argentine tango, these feelings of burnout and boredom have come up many times. Perhaps it is a feeling of not learning ‘fast enough’; or feeling that I am not pleasing my partners as much as I have been in the past; or perhaps that I simply am not sleeping enough! Worse still, on more than one occasion, I have felt that my local community was imploding, collapsing under the weight of it’s own bloat. Examples of this in my area include fifty-plus local teachers, several milongas on weekend nights all battling for limited numbers of dancers, or self-described ‘advanced’ dancers who refuse to improve their navigation skills. Whatever the reasons, one’s local tango scene can sometimes become a burden rather than a place of pleasure and revitalization. I imagine that one could find many more examples of community-induced madness.
When the feelings of tango burnout arise in me, I do one or all of these three things:
First, I just back off from tango. In spite of my bloated-ego wish to believe that I am the center of the tango universe, my local scene, and everything else in this world, will go on without me! I take a few days or even weeks off to do something else. I work on the house, do my taxes, mow the lawn and trim the roses. I take yoga and Spanish classes or (heaven forbid!) a Swing dance class. I do anything but tango, including not listening to tango music for a while. Balance in life, as in a good retirement portfolio, is key. Diversify and we will grow old gracefully and with our assets in tact. And our roses will be trimmed and our Spanish or French or Japanese more fluent. Tango will wait, and for me is always a bit ‘shinier’ when I return.
Second, if I am unable or unwilling to remove myself from the tango scene, I try something that is anathema to the normal tango learning process; rather than trying to learn something new, I go back to my roots, so to speak. For example, I have taken lately to walking only in parallel system for an entire night, or even for an entire month. This idea came to me while dancing when I looked around the milonga and saw virtually every leader dancing erratically in cross system. I was horrified to realize that I was doing exactly the same thing, following the ‘heard mentality’ that comes with social dancing and so many other human activities. It was apparent to me that trying harder to be ‘better’ and more interesting for my partners was simply not working for me or for her. In contrast, I now try to walk simpler, gentler, and more musical, but only in parallel system. The result is that I find myself in a more Zen-like state, unable to rush to my ‘comfort zone’ of dancing (which is cross system for me, the place where I sometimes lose my sense of balance and calm).
For followers, who cannot determine the system that you are walking in, I recommend trying something different from your ordinary patterns. For example try closing your eyes, and/or not doing any embellishments; or perhaps try focusing wholly and completely on the music and not so much on your partner. See if you can feel and breathe your way to calming yourself and your partner down - be a force of grounding and relaxation to him/her. They may wonder what the heck you are doing at first, but then he may just calm down himself as a result (or get stressed that things don’t feel ‘normal’ and start jumping around like a wild banshee). In either case, you can start to shift the static paradigm that you are in. So often followers are also trying to ‘be better’, or trying to achieve that ‘perfect tango image’ that is painted by professional stage dancers, but end up simply more tense and stressed as a result. Instead, just be your self. It cannot hurt to try, especially if you are frustrated with or tired of your tango. You may find new pearls of wisdom and understanding about the lead/follow relationship in that place of calm.
My last trick for keeping my dancing life fresh and renewed, is to occasionally dance less and spend more time socializing with friends and collogues at the milongas. First, I make sure that they are open to talking with me as I do not want to be in the way of their dancing with someone else or enjoying their night out. Perhaps the song playing is their very favorite, and I can reasonably assume that they may be looking for a partner to dance with. If not, I find it refreshing to spend quality time during a song, a tanda, perhaps even two tandas, just talking, telling jokes, catching up on old times or things to come. This is especially nice as there are so many dancers, both men and women, who for myriad reasons I do not get to dance with or don’t see very often. Making a personal connection can be very satisfying in those moments. The dance can wait; to be in a hurry to get back to it may just be exacerbating the tension and ambivalence that I might be feeling toward it.
Without question, for so many of us dancing tango is the absolute focus of our passion and drive to spend our money and travel sometimes hundreds or even thousands of miles to milongas and tango festivals. But, like so many things in life, dancing is a shared experience, one accomplished only with friends and acquaintances. Ultimately it is our friends who sustain us, not just our teachers and/or tango idols. We have the rest of our lives to pursue our passion, and we must make sure to nurture our selves and our friendships along the way.
Christopher Nassopoulos
October 2008
Friday, October 17, 2008
Some TangoFest Thoughts from Salem
Hello From Salem,
I had some thoughts to share that might help remind us of how to have the best time possible at TangoFest. I wrote these to a friend and they said i should share them, so here they are:
We've gone through those tango cycles before. You chase the tango high, and it eludes you. You force yourself to have expectations of yourself and others, then no one lives up to them. We get into routines then we bore ourselves.
I suggest this for that.
A: Go to some venue you've never done or at least not in the last 6 months (TangoFest).
B: have 1 glass of wine before going to said event. (no one needs the nerves)
C: when you get there, just do two things.
1) Be very, very, present in the moment! Don't worry about the steps that came before, or coming next, or last week or last class. In the present, nothing is wrong or right, it just IS!! Be one with the is-ness of the dance. Go with this and trust the intelligence of your body not your mind. Let it do what it feels not what you want or think.
2) When you start your embrace, take a moment to say to yourself, Here's another human being with their pains, pleasures, feels, offering to share their presents with me, and express their little piece of artist ability, solely to me for this dance. I will respect that and give them in return my presents and best. Through this act we will both grow some way.
It is when I bring myself back to these basic points that I have the best times and dances. Be pure to the moment, and connect with your body, your partner and all that surrounds you and the dance will take care of the rest. This is what works for me, I swear it.
Thanks Clay for all your efforts to make this wonderful thing happen so we all have a chance to share our dance together!
Frank Davis
I had some thoughts to share that might help remind us of how to have the best time possible at TangoFest. I wrote these to a friend and they said i should share them, so here they are:
We've gone through those tango cycles before. You chase the tango high, and it eludes you. You force yourself to have expectations of yourself and others, then no one lives up to them. We get into routines then we bore ourselves.
I suggest this for that.
A: Go to some venue you've never done or at least not in the last 6 months (TangoFest).
B: have 1 glass of wine before going to said event. (no one needs the nerves)
C: when you get there, just do two things.
1) Be very, very, present in the moment! Don't worry about the steps that came before, or coming next, or last week or last class. In the present, nothing is wrong or right, it just IS!! Be one with the is-ness of the dance. Go with this and trust the intelligence of your body not your mind. Let it do what it feels not what you want or think.
2) When you start your embrace, take a moment to say to yourself, Here's another human being with their pains, pleasures, feels, offering to share their presents with me, and express their little piece of artist ability, solely to me for this dance. I will respect that and give them in return my presents and best. Through this act we will both grow some way.
It is when I bring myself back to these basic points that I have the best times and dances. Be pure to the moment, and connect with your body, your partner and all that surrounds you and the dance will take care of the rest. This is what works for me, I swear it.
Thanks Clay for all your efforts to make this wonderful thing happen so we all have a chance to share our dance together!
Frank Davis
Monday, September 22, 2008
What's Happen' in Anchorage
Argentine Tango in Anchorage continues to grow with the addition of a new Monday night milonga at the University of Alaska Anchorage presented by Dustin and Katie Madden giving us two milongas a week for the winter(the other is Wed night at Club Soraya). Hiroko Oliver provides her home for a pot-luck/practica every Friday. We are looking forward to instruction from Tomas Howlin in October and Susana Miller in November brought up by Dan Boccia, one of our own.
The natural fall color change is spectacular. And the snowy summits let know that it is time to get ready for skiing, skating and winter adventuring in between our tango events.
The natural fall color change is spectacular. And the snowy summits let know that it is time to get ready for skiing, skating and winter adventuring in between our tango events.
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
The victim's story!
Yes, It was I that was the victim in Dianne's blog, although she was also one herself that night. Let me first say that I am a big fan of Raul's articles about tango and totally agree with Dianne's account of the incident. I'll never forget it. There is so much more to this story and I would like to share my side of it now in this forum. There are also a few interesting twists!
A little history about my tango background. I caught the bug almost three years ago at a New Years Eve ballroom social when a professional couple did a showcase dance on the Argentine Tango. I had never even heard of it before as I was fairly new to dancing in general, but when the strange music started to play and the attractive couple started dancing I was completely mesmerized and said to my friends "I want to learn that!" Tango was almost non-existent in my part of the state which made it very difficult to learn and dance, with no resident teachers or milongas in the immediate area.
I was determined to learn it somehow. I attended an introductory workshop that was provided locally a few months later, but there was still no real option to continue learning tango. I was refered to a DVD series that was very good and tried some self-training which was better than nothing, then I stumbled upon a small milonga that had just started (maybe 5-6 couples, all beginners). It wasn't enough though and I started a campaign to somehow bring more tango into our local community. I could go on and on about this, but within the past three years I have recruited teachers, started an email networking venture that evolved into a tango website, started monthly milongas, become the local milonga DJ, devoted all my dance training attention to tango and now my focus is on building the "regional" tango community along with helping the entire Florida tango network through the power of the internet. I have a traveling job that allows me to visit tango venues all over the state and have made a network of great tango friends! My dance shoes are always in the car just in case.
In general one of the biggest attractions to tango has been the people. Just about everywhere I go I have met the warmest, friendliest and passionate group of people and have always felt welcomed. This was not the case in the ballroom community and one reason that I have almost given the other dances altogether, although my girlfriend won't let that happen!
Recently, a tanguera from Italy visited our area and I consulted with her in regards to building tango communites because of her successes with doing so in a rural part of Italy. She directed me to Clay's website and to an article about the subject which I forwarded to some close tango friends of mine that are also trying to build our community here. One of them sent me an email reply about a milonga "horror story" that I should read in Clay's forum section. I found Dianne's article, read over it briefly and thought to myself......Oh, that sounds like what happened to me a couple of months ago. It wasn't until I re-read it carefully and noticed that the author was Dianne (with two n's) from Miami and then I realized that the story was actually about ME!
The funny thing that night was that when I first danced with Dianne I did not know it was her.....we had never met. We had actually exchanged some emails over the past year about Raul Cabral becasue she is a tango organizer in the Miami area and saw my website articles authored by Raul and invited me to attend his workshops when he came to south Florida last year, but I could not attend at the time, so we never actually did meet. It wasn't until a couple of weeks later that I saw a youtube video of the milonga venue that she had previously attended and it had mini-interviews with guests and Dianne's close friend and work partner was named in the video. I then put two and two together and realized that the tanda that I had enjoyed that night was with her and we didn't even realize that we had somewhat known each other becasue we had only exchanged first names after the dance!
OK, now to my story about that fateful night. I was on a business trip in Miami and stuck overnight and was looking forward to visiting a mid-week milonga at a very nice venue hosted by a lovely tangurea that I had made friends with through my netwroking efforts. I had actually visited this milonga a few times in the past but never had seen or danced with Dianne there. That particular night I showed up for the group lessons, which was mostly beginners and was glad to help balance the partner ratio. I would consider myself at this point in my training to be an intermediate tango dancer who has no problem helping and encouraging anyone who wants to learn the tango. It was a slow summer night and when the milonga started I was in a strange situation, the dancers were all coupled off or not available and I ended up sitting a lot. I started some dances with the beginners in the class, but because dancers must work to the level of the lesser experienced, it was not really that enjoyable for me.
Then I saw a couple of single ladies show up and after seeing them dance, I decided to ask Dianne for a tanda to some of my most favorite tango music. It was the typical first tanda experience between two people that are not beginners, the first being a sort of "test-drive", the second getting more comfortable with each other, and then the third really feeling connected. I was on a "tango-high" becasue of it and was smiling all the way back to her seat. I was really trying to practice what the milonga host had preached earlier in her lesson..."Do not ever leave your lady partner in the middle of the dance floor after your dance is over.....kindly escort her back to her seat and then say Thank You".....which is exactly what I did. She sat down next to her friend and I stood next to her while I scanned the room for my next invitation. It was a small dance floor and the traffic was actually moving towards me, so I was looking for the proper time to exit. That is when I heard a male voice directly behind me say "Do you mind if I tell you something about your dancing?"
My initial though was that I was about to be complimented, but at the same moment I noticed Dianne burst out in laughter with her friend , but I didn't relate it to what he had just said. I then had a gut feeling after turning and seeing him that it was going to turn into a critique of some sort. In hindsight I should have just said "No thanks" and just left, but I decided to listen for the mere entertainment value as I had an idea what might be coming next. Without introducing himself, this guy proceeded to tell me how wrong some of my technique was and before I even had the chance to comment he grabs Dianne from her seat and uses her to demonstrate. At this point I am feeling really bad for her, but it is too late. He gives his 5min. lesson and she quietly returns to her seat, obviously embarrased. I then want to know his name for reference, so I extend my hand and introduce myself and then he gives me his name, which I will keep private in this blog. I then whispered to him that what he just did was extremely rude and then immediately went to the other side of the dance floor to where my seat was. I didn't speak to him again that night nor did I speak or dance with Dianne again. I did however ask the milonga host, a three time tango champion to dance a vals to our favorite "Corozon de Oro" and it was fantastic, especially after she commented to me on how much I had improved since the last time we had danced together.
I don't consider myself a great tango dancer (yet) and know that I have my faults just like everybody else does while they are in the learning process which in tango can actually be an entire lifetime! Raul's essay and this experience were so coincidental that Dianne was motivated to post her blog right away. Since discovering it, I have even posted it on my tango website for the public to see and have seen and spoken with Dianne about that particular night. We have even had the pleasure of dancing together at another Miami milonga and again we had a very enjoyable time. Raul is coming to Miami soon and I am hoping to visit with him personally if I get the chance.
Unfortunately tango, like just about everthing else, does have its ugly side and this incident will stick with me but has not casued me any long-term harm.....just a learning experience is all. I totally agree that this sort of thing needs to be discouraged and maybe even policed at milongas somehow as I have seen it happen myself at our local venues. Classes and workshops are for teaching and learning, and the milongas are for socializing, dancing, and to have fun! So for all of you wannabe teachers out there, please hold your comments and advice for the classroom as it is not welcomed at the milongas!
Tango is very much a Gentlemen's dance and this is just plain good manners and proper milonga etiquette!
Thank you again for the tanda Dianne, Raul for your great articles, and Clay for your fabulous website!
Chuck from Florida
A little history about my tango background. I caught the bug almost three years ago at a New Years Eve ballroom social when a professional couple did a showcase dance on the Argentine Tango. I had never even heard of it before as I was fairly new to dancing in general, but when the strange music started to play and the attractive couple started dancing I was completely mesmerized and said to my friends "I want to learn that!" Tango was almost non-existent in my part of the state which made it very difficult to learn and dance, with no resident teachers or milongas in the immediate area.
I was determined to learn it somehow. I attended an introductory workshop that was provided locally a few months later, but there was still no real option to continue learning tango. I was refered to a DVD series that was very good and tried some self-training which was better than nothing, then I stumbled upon a small milonga that had just started (maybe 5-6 couples, all beginners). It wasn't enough though and I started a campaign to somehow bring more tango into our local community. I could go on and on about this, but within the past three years I have recruited teachers, started an email networking venture that evolved into a tango website, started monthly milongas, become the local milonga DJ, devoted all my dance training attention to tango and now my focus is on building the "regional" tango community along with helping the entire Florida tango network through the power of the internet. I have a traveling job that allows me to visit tango venues all over the state and have made a network of great tango friends! My dance shoes are always in the car just in case.
In general one of the biggest attractions to tango has been the people. Just about everywhere I go I have met the warmest, friendliest and passionate group of people and have always felt welcomed. This was not the case in the ballroom community and one reason that I have almost given the other dances altogether, although my girlfriend won't let that happen!
Recently, a tanguera from Italy visited our area and I consulted with her in regards to building tango communites because of her successes with doing so in a rural part of Italy. She directed me to Clay's website and to an article about the subject which I forwarded to some close tango friends of mine that are also trying to build our community here. One of them sent me an email reply about a milonga "horror story" that I should read in Clay's forum section. I found Dianne's article, read over it briefly and thought to myself......Oh, that sounds like what happened to me a couple of months ago. It wasn't until I re-read it carefully and noticed that the author was Dianne (with two n's) from Miami and then I realized that the story was actually about ME!
The funny thing that night was that when I first danced with Dianne I did not know it was her.....we had never met. We had actually exchanged some emails over the past year about Raul Cabral becasue she is a tango organizer in the Miami area and saw my website articles authored by Raul and invited me to attend his workshops when he came to south Florida last year, but I could not attend at the time, so we never actually did meet. It wasn't until a couple of weeks later that I saw a youtube video of the milonga venue that she had previously attended and it had mini-interviews with guests and Dianne's close friend and work partner was named in the video. I then put two and two together and realized that the tanda that I had enjoyed that night was with her and we didn't even realize that we had somewhat known each other becasue we had only exchanged first names after the dance!
OK, now to my story about that fateful night. I was on a business trip in Miami and stuck overnight and was looking forward to visiting a mid-week milonga at a very nice venue hosted by a lovely tangurea that I had made friends with through my netwroking efforts. I had actually visited this milonga a few times in the past but never had seen or danced with Dianne there. That particular night I showed up for the group lessons, which was mostly beginners and was glad to help balance the partner ratio. I would consider myself at this point in my training to be an intermediate tango dancer who has no problem helping and encouraging anyone who wants to learn the tango. It was a slow summer night and when the milonga started I was in a strange situation, the dancers were all coupled off or not available and I ended up sitting a lot. I started some dances with the beginners in the class, but because dancers must work to the level of the lesser experienced, it was not really that enjoyable for me.
Then I saw a couple of single ladies show up and after seeing them dance, I decided to ask Dianne for a tanda to some of my most favorite tango music. It was the typical first tanda experience between two people that are not beginners, the first being a sort of "test-drive", the second getting more comfortable with each other, and then the third really feeling connected. I was on a "tango-high" becasue of it and was smiling all the way back to her seat. I was really trying to practice what the milonga host had preached earlier in her lesson..."Do not ever leave your lady partner in the middle of the dance floor after your dance is over.....kindly escort her back to her seat and then say Thank You".....which is exactly what I did. She sat down next to her friend and I stood next to her while I scanned the room for my next invitation. It was a small dance floor and the traffic was actually moving towards me, so I was looking for the proper time to exit. That is when I heard a male voice directly behind me say "Do you mind if I tell you something about your dancing?"
My initial though was that I was about to be complimented, but at the same moment I noticed Dianne burst out in laughter with her friend , but I didn't relate it to what he had just said. I then had a gut feeling after turning and seeing him that it was going to turn into a critique of some sort. In hindsight I should have just said "No thanks" and just left, but I decided to listen for the mere entertainment value as I had an idea what might be coming next. Without introducing himself, this guy proceeded to tell me how wrong some of my technique was and before I even had the chance to comment he grabs Dianne from her seat and uses her to demonstrate. At this point I am feeling really bad for her, but it is too late. He gives his 5min. lesson and she quietly returns to her seat, obviously embarrased. I then want to know his name for reference, so I extend my hand and introduce myself and then he gives me his name, which I will keep private in this blog. I then whispered to him that what he just did was extremely rude and then immediately went to the other side of the dance floor to where my seat was. I didn't speak to him again that night nor did I speak or dance with Dianne again. I did however ask the milonga host, a three time tango champion to dance a vals to our favorite "Corozon de Oro" and it was fantastic, especially after she commented to me on how much I had improved since the last time we had danced together.
I don't consider myself a great tango dancer (yet) and know that I have my faults just like everybody else does while they are in the learning process which in tango can actually be an entire lifetime! Raul's essay and this experience were so coincidental that Dianne was motivated to post her blog right away. Since discovering it, I have even posted it on my tango website for the public to see and have seen and spoken with Dianne about that particular night. We have even had the pleasure of dancing together at another Miami milonga and again we had a very enjoyable time. Raul is coming to Miami soon and I am hoping to visit with him personally if I get the chance.
Unfortunately tango, like just about everthing else, does have its ugly side and this incident will stick with me but has not casued me any long-term harm.....just a learning experience is all. I totally agree that this sort of thing needs to be discouraged and maybe even policed at milongas somehow as I have seen it happen myself at our local venues. Classes and workshops are for teaching and learning, and the milongas are for socializing, dancing, and to have fun! So for all of you wannabe teachers out there, please hold your comments and advice for the classroom as it is not welcomed at the milongas!
Tango is very much a Gentlemen's dance and this is just plain good manners and proper milonga etiquette!
Thank you again for the tanda Dianne, Raul for your great articles, and Clay for your fabulous website!
Chuck from Florida
Sunday, September 7, 2008
AK Tango
We continue to grow as a tango community. Regular visits by various instructors(welcomed variety), and an expansion into the university population are helping greatly. An effort to break down barriers between the Argentine tango community and the American/ballroom groups is underway. The feel and look of tango in Alaska is brighter and positive, these days.
Monday, August 25, 2008
Hello, Seattle!
I started tango in Portland in 2006. Tango is my first focused dance study, and when I walked in, I knew nothing about the culture, knew no one in the community. If not for an inspiring and welcoming teacher I would never have continued past one lesson. Amy PK somehow managed to convey to me the magic of tango without my needing the skill. I was so lucky to find her.
Early this year I moved to Seattle. Now I had a clue (maybe two) about tango and how to navigate the social environment, but it was still scary to walk into a practica or milonga by myself. Still is.
Only a handful of months in Seattle -- what am I doing writing here? I've barely wetted my toes in the Seattle Tango Sound. I'm hardly Seattle's best representative. Anyone who wants to take my place here is welcome to.
Before I moved up, I asked every Portland tanguera/o I could, "what do you think of Seattle tango? What am I in for?" A few told me not to admit to being from Portland (fat chance!) and I'd be treated better. Now that I'm here I get asked "why did you come here from Portland, when tango there is so good?"
I have to laugh. I've seen so much respect in Seattle for the Portland tango scene. Portland is like the younger sibling who can't see adoration in the eyes of the older sibling.
So how does Portland tango compare to Seattle tango?
Who has it harder, follows or leads?
Right. There is no good answer. While I haven't been to all the venues, haven't met all the teachers, have barely begun to meet the dancers, the more I see of Seattle tanguero/a, the fewer generalizations I can make. We are, after all, made up of people, lots of people, lots of variety. There are some very open-hearted people here, some exquisite dancers, some excellent teachers. I have found experienced leads who asked me for my opinion and follows who didn't know me and reached out to me to make me welcome.
I have complaints, of course, but most apply just as well to Portland. I think beginners aren't brought along as well as they could be, and while I understand why, because so many of them bail as soon as they get a wiff of how hard tango is, I think that we can do better.
I'd like to see follows take more responsibility to bring up the new leads. We get to dance more interesting dances sooner, and we should offer back to the pool of new leads our experience as we were offered this from more experienced leads. We should be picky, of course, but be picky about spirit and focus and attitude. Encourage the kind of leads and attitudes you want to see in our community in years to come. Create the community you want now, by dancing with them.
Yes, I've been lectured by leads, but no more here than in Portland. Sometimes, if I can put aside my ego a bit, I learn something new. And I've learned to say, "I apprecite the comments, but how about we go back to dancing now?"
Seattle tanguera/o, I'm glad to be here. Chances are good you don't know me yet. I look forward to meeting you.
Early this year I moved to Seattle. Now I had a clue (maybe two) about tango and how to navigate the social environment, but it was still scary to walk into a practica or milonga by myself. Still is.
Only a handful of months in Seattle -- what am I doing writing here? I've barely wetted my toes in the Seattle Tango Sound. I'm hardly Seattle's best representative.
Before I moved up, I asked every Portland tanguera/o I could, "what do you think of Seattle tango? What am I in for?" A few told me not to admit to being from Portland (fat chance!) and I'd be treated better. Now that I'm here I get asked "why did you come here from Portland, when tango there is so good?"
I have to laugh. I've seen so much respect in Seattle for the Portland tango scene. Portland is like the younger sibling who can't see adoration in the eyes of the older sibling.
So how does Portland tango compare to Seattle tango?
Who has it harder, follows or leads?
Right. There is no good answer. While I haven't been to all the venues, haven't met all the teachers, have barely begun to meet the dancers, the more I see of Seattle tanguero/a, the fewer generalizations
I have complaints, of course, but most apply just as well to Portland. I think beginners aren't brought along as well as they could be, and while I understand why, because so many of them bail as soon as they get a wiff of how hard tango is, I think that we can do better.
I'd like to see follows take more responsibility to bring up the new leads. We get to dance more interesting dances sooner, and we should offer back to the pool of new leads our experience as we were offered this from more experienced leads. We should be picky, of course, but be picky about spirit and focus and attitude. Encourage the kind of leads and attitudes you want to see in our community in years to come. Create the community you want now, by dancing with them.
Yes, I've been lectured by leads, but no more here than in Portland. Sometimes, if I can put aside my ego a bit, I learn something new. And I've learned to say, "I apprecite the comments, but how about we go back to dancing now?"
Seattle tanguera/o, I'm glad to be here. Chances are good you don't know me yet. I look forward to meeting you.
Friday, August 1, 2008
Tango in Chicago
Over the past number of years the Chicago Tango community has taken a different direction and has grown significantly, sometimes for the better and sometimes for the worst. Better in that we now have more people involved with tango and it continues to grow as a community. Worst in that it also breeds alot of competition; but that is also a problem in other communities.
We now have alot of people in our community who now travel to other locations to attend workshops and tango festivals. This always helps with the level of dance. In addition, from a community that did not have any of its own festivals, we now have three festivals: the Chicago Mini Tango Festival (www.chicagotangofestival.com ) in April; the Chicago Tango Week (www.chicagotangoweek.com - formely Tango Joven festival) in July; and the International Tango Festival (www.chicagotangofest.com) in August. All of these festivals attract alot of dancers from outside of Chicago and to a certain extent exposes the Chicago dancers not only to those dancers but alot of fantastic instructors, performers and djs.
This past year we have had or will have some of the following great instructors at our festival: Pocho and Nely, Ruben Harymbat, Silvina Valz and Oliver Kolker, Alicia Pons, Robin Thomas and Kyla Mares, Robert Hauk, Diego Di Falco and Carolina Zolkaski, Donato Juarez and Carolina de Rivero, Pablo Inza & Maria Mondino, Claudia Gonzalez & Melina Brufman, Maria Blanco, Somer Surgit, Jorge Torres, Damian Edsell and Nancy Lousan, Eduardo Capussi and Mariana Flores, Roberto Reis and Vanessa Fatauros, Ariel Barrionuevo and Lorena Gasse, and Guillermo Merlo and Fernanda Ghi. We also have had the following great djs: Robin Thomas, Robert Hauk, Ramji V, Ilene Marder, Carlos Favre, Jason Laughlin, and Adam Hoopengardner.
In addition, to these festivals it seems as if we have at least one or two workshops with visiting instructors every month. This year we have had or will have numerous workshops with the following instructors: El Pulpo and Stepanie Lepeu, Susana Miller, Pablo Veron, Alex Krebs, Melina Brufman and Claudio Gonzalez, Enriqueta Kleinman and Nestor La Vitola, Daniel Tuero, Amira Campora and Javier Antar, Maxi Copello and Maria Blanco, Pocho and Nely, Roberto Reis andGuillermina Quiroga, and Gato Valdez and Andrea Monti, Nina Tatarowicz and David Sasha Tom, and Facundo Posadas.
Of course with all of these festivals and all of these workshops there is a need to grow the community to support all of these events. If that growth is not there then there will be some losers and some winners, depending on the business skill of that particular organizer. We are however trying to work on this and coordinate events so it becomes a "win-win" situation for all. I believe this has occurred in a number of other tango communities to the betterment of the community.
Besides all of the above we have a number of instructors in Chicago that contribute to the growth of Chicago, including but not limited to: Somer and Agape, Netza and Babette, Phoebe and Leroy, Ray and Anna, Romulo and Margo, Burak and Maria, Sarah, Misha, Ellen and Oleg, Ernest and Maricella, Erica and Douglas, Nina, Melanie, Jorge, Bob and Kathleen, Sarge, Daniel and Ramona, Fred and Yermen, Charlotte, Al, and Sherwin, to name a few.
We are also proud of the recent performance put together by our local tango orchestra, Alma de Tango, which is directed by Gerardo Perez. They recently put together a two-evening performance called "Tango is My Shadow" with a number of local tango performers as part of the production.
I am happy with the direction that Chicago has taken over the past couple of years (albeit with some detours) . I expect that better things are in store for Chicago in the future.
We now have alot of people in our community who now travel to other locations to attend workshops and tango festivals. This always helps with the level of dance. In addition, from a community that did not have any of its own festivals, we now have three festivals: the Chicago Mini Tango Festival (www.chicagotangofestival.com ) in April; the Chicago Tango Week (www.chicagotangoweek.com - formely Tango Joven festival) in July; and the International Tango Festival (www.chicagotangofest.com) in August. All of these festivals attract alot of dancers from outside of Chicago and to a certain extent exposes the Chicago dancers not only to those dancers but alot of fantastic instructors, performers and djs.
This past year we have had or will have some of the following great instructors at our festival: Pocho and Nely, Ruben Harymbat, Silvina Valz and Oliver Kolker, Alicia Pons, Robin Thomas and Kyla Mares, Robert Hauk, Diego Di Falco and Carolina Zolkaski, Donato Juarez and Carolina de Rivero, Pablo Inza & Maria Mondino, Claudia Gonzalez & Melina Brufman, Maria Blanco, Somer Surgit, Jorge Torres, Damian Edsell and Nancy Lousan, Eduardo Capussi and Mariana Flores, Roberto Reis and Vanessa Fatauros, Ariel Barrionuevo and Lorena Gasse, and Guillermo Merlo and Fernanda Ghi. We also have had the following great djs: Robin Thomas, Robert Hauk, Ramji V, Ilene Marder, Carlos Favre, Jason Laughlin, and Adam Hoopengardner.
In addition, to these festivals it seems as if we have at least one or two workshops with visiting instructors every month. This year we have had or will have numerous workshops with the following instructors: El Pulpo and Stepanie Lepeu, Susana Miller, Pablo Veron, Alex Krebs, Melina Brufman and Claudio Gonzalez, Enriqueta Kleinman and Nestor La Vitola, Daniel Tuero, Amira Campora and Javier Antar, Maxi Copello and Maria Blanco, Pocho and Nely, Roberto Reis andGuillermina Quiroga, and Gato Valdez and Andrea Monti, Nina Tatarowicz and David Sasha Tom, and Facundo Posadas.
Of course with all of these festivals and all of these workshops there is a need to grow the community to support all of these events. If that growth is not there then there will be some losers and some winners, depending on the business skill of that particular organizer. We are however trying to work on this and coordinate events so it becomes a "win-win" situation for all. I believe this has occurred in a number of other tango communities to the betterment of the community.
Besides all of the above we have a number of instructors in Chicago that contribute to the growth of Chicago, including but not limited to: Somer and Agape, Netza and Babette, Phoebe and Leroy, Ray and Anna, Romulo and Margo, Burak and Maria, Sarah, Misha, Ellen and Oleg, Ernest and Maricella, Erica and Douglas, Nina, Melanie, Jorge, Bob and Kathleen, Sarge, Daniel and Ramona, Fred and Yermen, Charlotte, Al, and Sherwin, to name a few.
We are also proud of the recent performance put together by our local tango orchestra, Alma de Tango, which is directed by Gerardo Perez. They recently put together a two-evening performance called "Tango is My Shadow" with a number of local tango performers as part of the production.
I am happy with the direction that Chicago has taken over the past couple of years (albeit with some detours) . I expect that better things are in store for Chicago in the future.
Saturday, July 12, 2008
When tango rears its ugly head...
Is tango, in its most pure, imperfect form, just too scary? Could this be the reason we spend so much time trying to make it so perfect? Perhaps, in an attempt at answering these questions we all really need to go back and take a good hard look at why we were drawn to tango in the first place. The true answer may not be that which we have been thinking, believing or even telling people for so long. The true answer might be a little scary.
Oh, our tango that we love so much. How it tortures us as we pile layers and layers of important tango matters one upon another in an attempt to make it perfect because, after all, if we do so, for sure our tango will be bigger and better. And yes, then, it will be perfect!
So, we worry. Do we know enough steps? Will we be noticed on the dance floor? Will the best dancers dance with us? Why won’t the best dancers dance with us? Our friend gets all the better tandas, torture. We dance for 6 hours straight, every tanda, proving we can do it. Keep going. We travel millions of miles to do the same. Driven, we strive, we practice, we learn, we critique…everything and everyone else. And we work. We speak the real tango because we are the ones who really know. We show. We compete? No… we don’t compete because we don’t need to, we’re the real deal. We’re the best because we invented the new wheel. Oh no, not us, we are above all that. And then, of course, we organize; events, milongas, shows, practicas, performances, classes, workshops, and then on that same day…we organize bigger events, and more events and only our events are important. Prove your loyalty, show me you are a good person, accept no one else’s event matters but mine…war. We do an incredible job building upon our tango; layers, one upon another, worry, work, organize, and perfect. Wow, tango really is exhausting when you try to make it perfect.
For the most part, the milongueros of Buenos Aires tire watching us dance, so much energy they say, slow down, slow down. So we painfully try to dance slower. But is that really what they want us to do? Does dancing slow make a tango perfect? Actually, in my opinion, it does not. None of the above makes a tango perfect because without acquiescing to the real reason we tango, it is all just conjecture.
While we are so busy taking care of tango matters, we turn our backs on its most compelling truth; a real tango is excruciatingly raw; it is so raw and exposed, it hurts. Since the early days of its origins, the most revered tango speaks to nothing more than expressing honest, raw, human emotion. It is this, it’s most natural quality that drew most of us to tango in the first place and yet we seem to be so scared of this, we fill our tango with all kinds of distractions. The truth is we all probably need to go to that place that is deep within us, that place that oozes release, exposing our many selves. Tango affords us safe haven, where it is ok to take emotional risks in the moment, for a moment. This is why the language of tango is so powerful and why we all keep coming back for more. Tango is healing and the need to heal belongs to all of us.
In its imperfection, its purest form, tango remains a dance of the people, about people, all else surrounding it only peripherally. If you really seek to make your tango perfect, go to that raw place of truth and stay there each time you come to your partner. Reveal your empathy, compassion and fulfill your fundamental need to give to another person by making your partner feel safe to do the same. And while you are there, in that very human place, that people place, then you will be able to truly rejoice, enjoying that perfect tanda, that wonderful event, that crowded milonga, that great performance, that inspiring class, and all of the people who celebrate life’s imperfections along with you.
Dianne from Miami
Request for Ideas for Organizing, Teaching and Growing a Community
Dear Reader,
Our community recently lost two tango teachers which leaves a void for classes and growing the community. There is a core group of about eight dancers who practice together regularly and have decided to put a class together to help fill the vacuum. We have come up with a venue which is conveniently situated within driving distance of several towns but we will only be able to have the venue every other Monday. Although I’m a little skeptical, the group wants to have a combination class for beginners and intermediates with emphasis on the fundamentals. The group wants to concentrate on fundamentals for half an hour then have a class for at least an hour with practice after that. How is it possible to keep it simple enough for the beginners, but at the same time keep it interesting for intermediates?
The second question has to do with the core group. When we discuss the class, we seem to spend a lot of time on talking about one technique or courtesy, but get little actual planning of content or syllabus done. Would you recommend the group develop more organizational structure with buy-in for work assignments or leave it loosely organized? Most seem ready to help and offer ideas at this point. I’m just a little concerned that, “too many cooks may spoil the stew”, and teaching by, “committee”, may be somewhat awkward. Are there things which the group should consider or, likewise, try and avoid?
Many thanks for your thoughts,
G
Our community recently lost two tango teachers which leaves a void for classes and growing the community. There is a core group of about eight dancers who practice together regularly and have decided to put a class together to help fill the vacuum. We have come up with a venue which is conveniently situated within driving distance of several towns but we will only be able to have the venue every other Monday. Although I’m a little skeptical, the group wants to have a combination class for beginners and intermediates with emphasis on the fundamentals. The group wants to concentrate on fundamentals for half an hour then have a class for at least an hour with practice after that. How is it possible to keep it simple enough for the beginners, but at the same time keep it interesting for intermediates?
The second question has to do with the core group. When we discuss the class, we seem to spend a lot of time on talking about one technique or courtesy, but get little actual planning of content or syllabus done. Would you recommend the group develop more organizational structure with buy-in for work assignments or leave it loosely organized? Most seem ready to help and offer ideas at this point. I’m just a little concerned that, “too many cooks may spoil the stew”, and teaching by, “committee”, may be somewhat awkward. Are there things which the group should consider or, likewise, try and avoid?
Many thanks for your thoughts,
G
Monday, June 30, 2008
Raul's essay and Dianne's response
Clay,
Preach it, brother! When Marjorie and I even bother to attend the local milongas here in Bellingham, we're heart-broken at the behavior that goes on, and not just the impromptu lessons that spring up in the middle of the ronda, such as it is.
But when it's the other local teachers and milonga organizers here who are the absolute worst perpetrators, what chance do we have to impress on anyone else that these behaviors are unacceptable?
Michael
Tango Bellingham
Sunday, June 29, 2008
Raul Cabral Essay
I have a true story (only one of many actually) which exemplifies just how negative the behavior Raul describes in his essay can be, which I am going to tell because I would like to know two things; are my horror stories worse than anyone else’s and… Mom, when can I stop feeling like I have to be so polite all the time, no matter what happens? This occurrence happened just this week at one of our local milongas.
A relatively slow night at the milonga I am asked to dance by a man, a first time visitor to our community, we do not know one another. We dance a Pugliese tanda, music is great, the gentleman, a kind, sensitive, musical dancer, the tanda, very, very nice considering his level as a dancer. We chat, dance, and at the end of the tanda he generously expresses to me how wonderful of a time he has just had. I give him a big thank you and a smile. Tanda over, we break, he leads me to my seat, I sit down and so happens, he stands immediately next to me watching the dance floor. Unbeknownst to him and me at the time, standing directly next to him is a member of our tango community whose desire to teach is so strong that at just about every milonga he is doing so, on the floor, off the floor, outside the door, in the hall, etc. I, still sitting, am also watching the dance floor and all of a sudden I hear these words right next to me, “Do you mind if I tell you something about your dancing?”. I cringe, as I now realize what is about to happen. The “lesson” starts and he proceeds to “teach” the visitor everything he did wrong (supposedly) in the tanda, the embrace, position for the follower, etc., etc., etc., it went on what seemed an eternity. I am absolutely shrinking in my chair from embarrassment, when all of a sudden the “teacher” pulls me up from my chair to use me as his demonstration partner for this “lesson”. I was so shocked and mortified at his insensitivity and his arrogance, so much so, that I couldn’t say a word, all I could do was immediately sit down again. Minutes go by, the excruciating “lesson” is finally over and the visitor, almost immediately, crosses the entire milonga floor to the farthest corner of the room. After that, the “teacher”, who must have seen the disgust in my eyes, asks me this, “Did I do the wrong thing by doing that?”. I honestly could not speak at that point and couldn’t answer him, something that has bothered me since.
First of all, one could assume, perhaps incorrectly, that for the most part, this negative behavior is primarily bestowed upon followers. But, in this instance, this man’s victim was another man. Now, just so you gentlemen out there who may be reading this, have an understanding of what happened, try to imagine this, put yourselves in this situation. You are in a new community (are from a much smaller town) at a local milonga and don’t really know anyone. You have just danced with a partner and for whatever reason, she made you feel great. You are pumped, happy, feeling really good about yourself and your dancing (we have all been there at one time or another, regardless of one’s level). She sits down and you stand immediately next to her and all of a sudden, a “teacher”, in what would appear a friendly manner, begins to critique everything you were (supposedly) doing wrong during the tanda, IN DIRECT EARSHOT OF THE LADY YOU HAVE JUST DANCED WITH (um, you remember the tanda, the tanda you enjoyed, that left you feeling happy and excited and maybe wanting to dance more until about a second ago)! Not only that, but the “teacher” then proceeds to use this same lady (suggesting she concurs with his analysis of your dancing), BRINGING HER FACE TO FACE TO YOU, to demonstrate and to make absolutely sure you FULLY understand the depth of your shortcomings as a leader right smack in front of her. OK, guys out there, this really happened, so tell me, how would you react to something like this?
Personally, I consider this to be one of the worst horror stories I have ever experienced in regard to this subject. Even though it was not immediately directed at me, for me it was worse than if it were. The “teacher’s” behavior narcissistic, with everyone else within earshot, recognizing it to be bullying, humiliating, unnecessary and unsolicited, and, in my opinion, completely insulting to our tango community, sending the message that we do not know how to treat visiting dancers when I know that not the case at all.
I wonder, is this the worst story or are there others out there, because I think this is about the worst I have ever experienced? And here is where I ask myself (and my mother… maybe she sent Raul’s essay to me at such an opportune time), why, didn’t I react differently? Why didn’t I let this “teacher” know how disrespectful I considered his actions, both to this leader, a visitor to our community, and to me, immediately? I realize I always feel that if I bring attention to negative actions by others, by responding negatively then I am doing nothing more than creating a feeding frenzy for more of the same, something I abhor, especially at milongas, but now I must ask, when is enough, enough?
Thank you Raul and Clay.
Dianne
Email feedback concerning Raul's Essay about teaching at a milonga
Thanks for sharing….well said by Raul….haven’t we all seen that too often!
C
======================
Dear Clay,
Thank you for sending this out to the community. There are a few lovely leads who cannot resist teaching and it is so appropriate for us all to be reminded of the spirit of Milonga.
S
===============
here here! Thanks for distributing this, Clay. I have been subjected to this very boorish behavior myself! I think men that can't enjoy the dance, and have to start teaching, are just control freaks, and demonstrate a personality completely unsuitable for dancing--and relationships in general.Truly,
E O
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He really hits the nail on the head. The other side of the coin is to not ask teachers to teach during a milonga. The Milonga is the place to dance. Do what you know how to do well. If you need to practice something new - go to a Practica.
That's my two cents.
S S
=========================
Thank you, Clay! Very appropriate. I hope the involved parties get the message, although they are often the ones in denial L
A
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I would love to see this nicely printed and posted at all the milonga venues.
D
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Thanks for the info Clay. It's probably something we're all needing to pay closer attention to.
P
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I will be forwarding this one. An important topic and oh so annoying.
C
=======================
Well said. Cabral is correct and I agree completely, even though I am guilty of "suggesting" things about how to better follow me (although thankfully far less than in the past), and usually after she has asked me to dance, then proceeds to dance with me exactly as she did with the previous bloke. Just the same, shame on me. Good for you for posting it.
C
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Loving this! Yeah Raul!
D
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Dear Clay,
THANK YOU!!!!
The one bit of teaching I have done at milongas is to tell a would be teacher that I don't consider our tanda to be a dance class. There can be collusion on the part of beginners, eager for feedback that plays into this as well, but I agree that it is the more experienced dancer's responsibility to avoid teaching.
Thanks for putting this info out there,
EB
===============
Thank you for sending this Clay - such an important message!
=============
PS...
How about including " during a lesson" with this? I was in a salsa class last night & had a student correcting me while the instructor was talking! Even funnier was that she was the one in error :o Anyway, enough of that. Thanks again!
=================
Well said, Clay!
Hope this makes a difference, especially to the mediocre leaders out there eager to compensate for their lack of dancing (and social) skills.
Thank you for sharing Clay. Great article!
N
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Hey Clay, I really loved this email & will be passing on to my own swing & ballroom students! Thanks sooo much & I'm looking forward to doing more tango.
==============================
I find that it is not always the case and when this is sent out by an expert like yourself it becomes Tango Law.
That makes me sad.
AJ
Friday, June 27, 2008
THE MILONGA IS NOT THE PLACE TO TEACH
By Raul Cabral
Inspiration to preserve the pleasant ambience of the milongas has encouraged me to write these few lines. I need not refer to the pleasant physical benefits the practice of tango brings to our health, as this is currently being done by innumerable medical studies. But I do wish to stress, although not exhaustively, the importance of the mental benefit – the emotional benefit we derive from the milongas.
For most of us, preoccupied after long days of work, going to a milonga affords us respite, a place where life’s tribulations may disappear or at the very minimum seem to dissipate. Here, of course, is where we communicate, where we find an established setting to express ourselves socially. Our suffering set aside, it is here we are able to calm our spirit. Our dance breathes optimism into our lives and when charged with this positive energy, many find it easier to confront life’s battles.
Therefore, in order to participate in the true spirit of the milonga, first, we all need to commit to that which is a mutual obligation, to conserve and whenever possible, add to its festive spirit. All of us should contribute, taking necessary care to assure this continues. Our appropriate behaviors at the milongas will help make this happen.
Tango possesses so many positive qualities, yet sometimes wrong conduct sabotages the possibility of these positive qualities coming together. I invite you to reflect upon one behavior in particular, even if you do not share in this commentary.
In general tango classes are given privately or before the start of the proper milonga referenced above. One reprehensible behavior is teaching anyone to dance after the start of or during the time of the milonga. Those who do should understand their actions are nothing more than a mere attempt to teach. All of us who are professional dancers, teachers, maestros, etc., absolutely all, know that in a few minutes it is impossible to teach or to learn. I repeat, it is merely an attempt and those who attempt this are fully aware of whom the victims of their arrogance and inferiority complex may be. The usual victim is the novice or inexperienced dancer at the milongas, eager to learn and enter into our marvelous world or, better yet, the occasional dancer, most likely a beginner, who has spent little time on the dance floor, who will acquiesce silently in order to avoid facing major troubles.
At first the intention would appear noble and generous, but this hides the true and unpleasant expression manifested by this behavior which is to assert oneself or make oneself appear to be an expert within the dance. A second intention of he who attempts to teach or make corrections during the dance is to imprint an indelible message upon his partner that she lacks skill, is clumsy or is not capable. He does this by correcting or reproaching errors during the dance, typical of all dance couples at one time or another, as if exclusive to his current partner. Even if his partner feels magnificent within the dance and does not concur, he will criticize her trying to prove her lack of knowledge, even to the point of becoming rude and unpleasant. Of course, then, the partner becomes angry. As incredible as this may sound, this clearly describes the behaviors of these “personalities”. What these “personalities” don’t realize is that the person on the receiving end of their so-called recommendations actually feels disgraced, their momentary or casual error publicly displayed, so that all can see.
Lacking in attributes, what these know-it-alls really need know is that chatter pertaining to their attitudes circulates, regarding them highly unfavorably because they demonstrate nothing but negativity towards others. They are actually milestones away from their purpose of trying to prove their expertise.
While dancing, if a mistake occurs, even if the mistake is not yours, expressing an apology makes you the better man. Every woman will be eternally grateful, as this raises her self-esteem and her confidence in her partner, the result having an immediate consequence, a better tango. If for some reason, that is not the case, always; the milonga offers the possibility of another partner with which to share a marvelous few minutes of tango.
In my role as a maestro, oftentimes my partners request or invite me to advise or warn them of that which I would consider an eventual correction of their dance, even sometimes wanting me to judge or quantify their dancing skills right then and there at the end. Not even at that moment, having their consent to do so, do I espouse any opinion. I refuse to do so, the reason being my understanding of the implications of my professional title.
You do not teach or make corrections to anyone’s dance at the milongas, as this is reserved for private settings. My stated position on this issue is shared for the most part by all maestros and instructors, therefore; I ask, why should anyone accept that dancers, possessing no authority by training, pretend to teach at the milongas? You do not teach or correct anyone in the milongas; the private setting is reserved for this. Furthermore and foremost to this condition, to truly teach, one must always first rely upon the other person accepting you do so.
Anyone who possesses increased knowledge can transmit that knowledge anywhere, except in the milongas, where doing so only serves to cloak one’s arrogance and lack of pride. No one ought to desire, arousing in others, such negative sentiments.
We should go to the milongas to share in the party and have fun rejoicing together, not to teach. Preserve the atmosphere of the milongas, so that it continues to be a welcoming place, an inexhaustible fountain that provides us only pleasure.
The milongas belong to everyone, let’s take care of them.
Thanking you for the opportunity to serve you.
Raul Cabral
Inspiration to preserve the pleasant ambience of the milongas has encouraged me to write these few lines. I need not refer to the pleasant physical benefits the practice of tango brings to our health, as this is currently being done by innumerable medical studies. But I do wish to stress, although not exhaustively, the importance of the mental benefit – the emotional benefit we derive from the milongas.
For most of us, preoccupied after long days of work, going to a milonga affords us respite, a place where life’s tribulations may disappear or at the very minimum seem to dissipate. Here, of course, is where we communicate, where we find an established setting to express ourselves socially. Our suffering set aside, it is here we are able to calm our spirit. Our dance breathes optimism into our lives and when charged with this positive energy, many find it easier to confront life’s battles.
Therefore, in order to participate in the true spirit of the milonga, first, we all need to commit to that which is a mutual obligation, to conserve and whenever possible, add to its festive spirit. All of us should contribute, taking necessary care to assure this continues. Our appropriate behaviors at the milongas will help make this happen.
Tango possesses so many positive qualities, yet sometimes wrong conduct sabotages the possibility of these positive qualities coming together. I invite you to reflect upon one behavior in particular, even if you do not share in this commentary.
In general tango classes are given privately or before the start of the proper milonga referenced above. One reprehensible behavior is teaching anyone to dance after the start of or during the time of the milonga. Those who do should understand their actions are nothing more than a mere attempt to teach. All of us who are professional dancers, teachers, maestros, etc., absolutely all, know that in a few minutes it is impossible to teach or to learn. I repeat, it is merely an attempt and those who attempt this are fully aware of whom the victims of their arrogance and inferiority complex may be. The usual victim is the novice or inexperienced dancer at the milongas, eager to learn and enter into our marvelous world or, better yet, the occasional dancer, most likely a beginner, who has spent little time on the dance floor, who will acquiesce silently in order to avoid facing major troubles.
At first the intention would appear noble and generous, but this hides the true and unpleasant expression manifested by this behavior which is to assert oneself or make oneself appear to be an expert within the dance. A second intention of he who attempts to teach or make corrections during the dance is to imprint an indelible message upon his partner that she lacks skill, is clumsy or is not capable. He does this by correcting or reproaching errors during the dance, typical of all dance couples at one time or another, as if exclusive to his current partner. Even if his partner feels magnificent within the dance and does not concur, he will criticize her trying to prove her lack of knowledge, even to the point of becoming rude and unpleasant. Of course, then, the partner becomes angry. As incredible as this may sound, this clearly describes the behaviors of these “personalities”. What these “personalities” don’t realize is that the person on the receiving end of their so-called recommendations actually feels disgraced, their momentary or casual error publicly displayed, so that all can see.
Lacking in attributes, what these know-it-alls really need know is that chatter pertaining to their attitudes circulates, regarding them highly unfavorably because they demonstrate nothing but negativity towards others. They are actually milestones away from their purpose of trying to prove their expertise.
While dancing, if a mistake occurs, even if the mistake is not yours, expressing an apology makes you the better man. Every woman will be eternally grateful, as this raises her self-esteem and her confidence in her partner, the result having an immediate consequence, a better tango. If for some reason, that is not the case, always; the milonga offers the possibility of another partner with which to share a marvelous few minutes of tango.
In my role as a maestro, oftentimes my partners request or invite me to advise or warn them of that which I would consider an eventual correction of their dance, even sometimes wanting me to judge or quantify their dancing skills right then and there at the end. Not even at that moment, having their consent to do so, do I espouse any opinion. I refuse to do so, the reason being my understanding of the implications of my professional title.
You do not teach or make corrections to anyone’s dance at the milongas, as this is reserved for private settings. My stated position on this issue is shared for the most part by all maestros and instructors, therefore; I ask, why should anyone accept that dancers, possessing no authority by training, pretend to teach at the milongas? You do not teach or correct anyone in the milongas; the private setting is reserved for this. Furthermore and foremost to this condition, to truly teach, one must always first rely upon the other person accepting you do so.
Anyone who possesses increased knowledge can transmit that knowledge anywhere, except in the milongas, where doing so only serves to cloak one’s arrogance and lack of pride. No one ought to desire, arousing in others, such negative sentiments.
We should go to the milongas to share in the party and have fun rejoicing together, not to teach. Preserve the atmosphere of the milongas, so that it continues to be a welcoming place, an inexhaustible fountain that provides us only pleasure.
The milongas belong to everyone, let’s take care of them.
Thanking you for the opportunity to serve you.
Raul Cabral
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